It’s been a blonde year….

Okay, I’m just a bottle blonde so what follows below should be in no way representative of my personal level of ditziness…but actually, rather alarmingly, it is!

Thanks to my friend Gerry for forwarding this to me :

“Blonde’s Year in Review

January

Took new scarf back to  store because it was too tight.

February

Fired from pharmacy job  for failing to print labels…..

Helllloooo!!!…….bottles  won’t fit in printer !!!

March

Got really  excited…..finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months….. box said ‘2-4  years!’

April

Trapped on escalator for  hours …. power went out!!!

May

Tried to make  Kool-Aid…..wrong instructions….8 cups of

water won’t fit into  those little packets!!!

June

Tried to go water  skiing…….couldn’t find a lake with a slope.

July

Lost breast stroke  swimming competition…..learned later,

the other swimmers  cheated, they used their arms!!!

August

Got locked out of my car  in rain storm…..

car swamped because  soft-top was open.

September

The capital of California  is ‘C’…..isn’t it???

October

Hate M &  M’s…..they are so hard to peel.

November

Baked turkey for 4 1/2  days .. instructions said 1 hour

per pound and I weigh  108!!

December

Couldn’t call 911 .  ‘duh’…..there’s no ‘eleven’
Button on the stupid  phone!!!


THE  BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR – SO FAR

A  man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde  female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the  mailbox.

She  opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.

A  little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box  and again,  opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into  the house she went.

As  the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out  again,  marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it  closed harder than ever.

Puzzled  by her actions the man asked her, ‘Is something wrong?’

To  which she replied, ‘There certainly is!

(Are  you ready? This is a beauty…)

My  stupid computer keeps saying, ‘YOU’VE GOT MAIL!’

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